Important Things Come

The important things often come to us disguised. Don’t you think this is true?

***

The other day, I talked with an elderly man who, unsolicited, told me, “I got the least education of any of my brothers. Went to work when I was ‘leven year old. Worked as a carpenter, buildin’ houses. I built the house I live in. Built houses for two of my brothers. Built one house before I retired that cost a half…uh…milyun….dollars. That was my last one. My brothers all had to ask me for help at least once. And I helped ’em. That’s what you do for fambly. I didn’t mind to help ’em out. But I never had to ask nobody for no help. I didn’t have no education, but I stood on my own.”

I was touched by his absolute need to establish himself with me, a stranger. His hands were large and as rough as the wood that built his life. His eyes were the blue of chicory blossoms, peering out at me from his weathered and etched face. He had the natural aristocratic bearing I have observed from time to time among simple, confident men.

He stood on his own.

***

My wife and I listened to a radio program today that sometimes features folk singers. While I do enjoy this genre of music, some of it raises my hackles because of the singer performing it. Many of the artists sing of small towns and general stores and local folk…but I’ve noticed that these same singers actually hold common people and small towns and their values in utter contempt. Their “art” is a pose, a lucrative one. It’s great work if you can get it.

And lots of current celebrities affect a down-home, folksy demeanor. I’ve noticed that more and more of them use the expression “Bless your heart.” This phrase has not only been over-used, but also over-analyzed and over-explained. I can’t count the number of monologues I’ve heard or read about how versatile “Bless your heart” is, serving as commiseration, insult, and general throwaway insincere chattertalk.

But as a Southerner, I find the phrase “I wish you’d look” far more useful and nuanced.

It can be used as an expression of affection and delight: “I wish you’d look at that baby, holding his sippy cup like his Papaw holds his coffee cup…”

It can be used as a lament: “I wish you’d look at that tree that fell into our living room, just two weeks after we put the new metal roof on…”

And it can be used as a withering put-down: “I wish you’d look at that dress she’s wearing. And I wish you’d look at her hips when she walks across the room. Looks like two dogs fighting under a polka dot blanket…”

I wish you’d look at that atheistic folk singer, emoting about the loss of the small town cafe, when he hates everything the small town stands for.

***

Over at his blog, William James Tychonievich has written a lovely and interesting post about Adam’s naming the animals in the early days of Creation. Very original thinking, and comforting, too. I say “comforting” because it’s nice to know that my wife and I are not alone in our habit of hanging monikers on most of the living creatures we encounter on our smallholding. William’s observations are important.

***

On this morning’s walk, I was deep in thought, looking at my own feet as they swung forward on the gravel road. As I wound my way down, I looked up to one side at the pasture that was now at eye level, and I saw something move. At first I thought it was a couple of rabbits. But when I stopped and allowed my eyes to focus, I saw two fawns hidden in the grass, quiet and obedient and still — except for the flickering ears. Looking up along the ridge line, I saw two does grazing. I took a photo, then moved as quietly as I could on down the road, and a little while later when I returned, the fawns and the does had become memory. My heart was lighter and cleaner for having seen them, and for having been seen by them.

The important things often come to us disguised. Don’t you think this is true?

~ S.K. Orr