I Never Thought I'd Be In This Situation
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Yule Sea
Adrift now, wishing it was already deep into January, past the vulgarity of the present. Behold, I show you a mystery: the death of an old dog can unsettle a man to the point where he sees fissures in all that he stands on. It can make him fight for balance. It can make him weary beyond sighing. When I was a boy, we got our Christmas trees from a lot one block over, next to the railroad tracks. The tree, holy and perfect and aromatic, was nailed to a wooden cross, and we saw it as a being both aware and benevolent. My honor as a child was to…
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Like Cold Water To A Weary Soul
On a day when I had been debating about whether this blog is a waste of everyone’s time, I received two emails from readers, emails that occupied my mind through much of the last few hours. The first email was from a gentleman who wishes to remain anonymous. His words were generous and uplifting and so very, very timely. What he expressed about this blog made me feel that perhaps it serves a purpose after all, at least for the time being. So my friend — and you know who you are — thank you. The phrase “You made my day” is overused, but in this case, it is quite…
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Passages
There’s snow on the ground today. I wish you were here to see it, girl. When I walked up to your grave after I got home from work, I thought of how much you loved the white stuff, how you’d throw yourself into banks of it and run around like your tail was on fire, how you once tricked your Mama by hiding a vole in the snow and then redirecting her attention, and how you’d scoop a small pile of it onto your nose and run to me, knowing that I’d laugh like a fool. I used to accuse you of being a Viking dog, do you…
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Jacketed By Grief
My wife and I returned the other day from a lovely, happy trip back home to visit family in Texas. I had planned to post a summary of our vacation once we’d settled back in. My plans came to a sudden and shattering stop this morning when I arose from sleep to let the dogs outside and make coffee. My dog was right where she’d been when I went to bed last night, almost in the exact same position. But the old girl had died in her sleep. She had gone away forever, exiting my life in the space of a mere six hours, taking her warmth and her presence…
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Time Spent
I spent a couple of hours last night rearranging the furniture in the family room in anticipation of the coming cold weather. I moved our chairs near the wood stove and moved out some of the other fixtures. A bit of sweat, a lot of groaning, and it almost looked like a new room. My old dog sat at my feet after I was done and looked at me as if to say, “Well, that was interesting….” Today is an anniversary of sorts. On this day, way back in the Seventies, I boarded a jet for my first airplane ride and streaked out west to stand on the yellow footprints…
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My Absolute Favorite….
…religious cartoon of all time. With gratitude to the Perry Bible Fellowship. ~ S.K. Orr
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The Why & The What
I have no idea what this is supposed to mean. Before awakening this morning, I was immersed in a vivid dream. In the dream, my wife and I were back at our Texas home. We were in the backyard and the light seemed to indicate that it was around dusk. While we were sitting and talking, something –moving so fast it was a blur — came into our vision. It sped past us and crashed into the window near where we were sitting. My wife and I jumped up and ran into the house. The interior of the house seemed immense, and we made our way down the halls and…
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Perchance, Perchance
My questions never end, you know. And sometimes I am unprepared to even ask them, to form them into sensible words. I awaken sometimes and am so sure, so very sure, that someone...someone was talking with me just before I opened my eyes. I kick back to the surface of Here and when I lift my conscious face out of Wherever I Was, I am disoriented and off-balance, as if someone pulled a crutch from beneath my arm or a chair from under me. Perhaps my Father has sealed the answers to my questions in a scroll, in a book, and perhaps I am the only one worthy to break…
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Seemed To Mock
The other morning, I kept watching the moon as I drove down the mountain to work. Waning in its phase, it hung in the air with just the bottom crescent illuminated. The image was like a photo negative of a smiley-face logo but with the eyes closed. The lunar face seemed to mock me as I stole glances at it. Looking back now from the vantage point of week’s end, the impression of mockery doesn’t seem so fantastical. That same night, my wife and I were relaxing after an arduous day when she wrinkled her nose and turned to me. “Do you smell that?” she asked. I took a breath.…
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The Magical Leaf
It’s one of those things in this region that holds on. You not only see people using it in its various forms, but also growing it, even in small, hillside or backyard patches. The farms near my home in any direction, dug into the rocky mountain soil, coax vegetable and grain crops each year, but a surprising number of them grow the devil’s lettuce. A country drive at this time of year will take one past leafy fields so pretty and so poetic, they make even a tee-tobacco-er want to stop and get out and gather an armful. This dedication to tobacco is not only understandable to me, but also…